It’s over.
We found out today that the school is closing. The girls’ last day is August 8 and my last day of work is a week later.
I feel so much right now I can’t say I even know what I feel. It is as if I took all the colors of a paint kit and dumped them in a bucket. The resulting color is the best representation of my current feelings; muddled, disgusting, and useless yet still unable to be ignored.
I am Jack's Raincloud
I can’t say there is anything all that new to report. My school is still in danger of closing and we still have no idea what is going on. I still have not given up hope. I hope for the girls’ sake that something good happens very soon. They NEED this.
Recently, I watched a movie called “Danny Deckchair.” It’s an Australian movie from 2003 where actor Rhys Ifans plays a happy-go-lucky cement truck driver who loves camping and has all sorts of silly ideas; including but not limited to tying a bunch of balloons to a deckchair and flying wherever the wind takes him.The most intriguing thing about Danny is that he is not the “run-of-the-mill” romantic comedy movie flirty hunk. Danny has his own charm and he is fiercely himself. He has unique interests and beliefs that, throughout the course of the film, prove to be the most important thing to him. Danny dares to be himself and break the mold of the boring male love interest.His actions in the film inspire other people to do things they wouldn’t normally do.
There is one line that I feel humorously encapsulates the film’s purpose. A newscaster reporting about Danny’s trip says, “Danny’s journey has inspired many people. Today a local man climbed to the top of a telephone pole with a chair and sat there all day. When asked why he would do such a thing, he replied because it was something he’d always wanted to do.”
My point in writing all this is to ask you this: What is it that you have always wanted to do? Are you doing it? What is stopping you?
I say go get it.
I leave you with a quotation from the infamous Todd “Too $hort” Shaw
Short Dog's In The House
“You should be gettin it, everything you wanted
Everything you dreamed of, never have to front
you should be gettin it, gettin money
I’m talking about you black, don’t laugh it aint funny
You should get a good lawyer, like Johnny Cochran
Swear to tell the truth, hell no I didn’t pop him
Get your kids in school, so they can get an education
Get a degree, and take a vacation”
“All men dream, but not equally.
Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds,
wake in the day to find that it was vanity:
but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men,
for they may act on their dreams with open eyes, to make them possible.”
- T. E. Lawrence
The above quotation inspires me quite a bit. I do dream that the SONG Program can continue to exist. Ways to make this possible consume my consciousness to the point where I forget what time it is. I keep imagining these girls going back to public school and being put in a class with 20 other kids and a teacher. This is of course not to say that the teachers they would get would not be capable and intelligent, just that they would also be responsible for 20+ other children and that there would be no where near as much one-on-one assistance and no regular personal and family therapy.
I mean, sure, I am worried about my job, but honestly, the much bigger concern is the children. It may take me one day, one week, or one year to get a teaching job, but eventually, I’ll get one. These children get one childhood. One chance to ramp it up, develop good habits, and get the skills they need to pass school and not drop out. I hope something good happens…
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